Merry Christmas, Howdy Partner: What I'd Want in a Western

I'm hanging out with the family (Merry Christmas to those who partake, by the way!) and we're watching (well, they are - I'm working on the computer!) a Western from the '60s. It's amusing to me to see women in pioneer style clothes but who have '60s style somewhat beehive-y hair.

One geezer "merchant" in the movie said that he deals in whiskey and women. I commented that I prefer men and Merlot, myself ;)

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It's not a white Christmas here at my family's house in the west side of the state, but based on the police scanner Facebook page for where I currently live, it is there -- and it sounds as if the roads were nasty last night! I hope that they're cleared up and my friends over there are enjoying the white Christmas.

From my Western to yours, enjoy the holiday!

Store Review: Phil's Stuff, Grand Rapids, Michigan

Phil's Stuff

722 Wealthy Street Southeast
Grand Rapids, Michigan 49503
616-459-1940
Hours: usually Saturdays 10-4 pm; if building looks occupied at other times, knock to be let in
www.philsstuff.com
Buying/selling antiques, estate items, architectural items, as well as metal yard art

On Wealthy Street, in a southeast neighborhood that is reviving itself through new businesses, a store packed to the brim with curiosities awaits for shoppers looking for the eclectic. The store is part antique store, part local crafts store, and part...well, one wouldn't say junk store so much, but owner Phil Ondersma's title of "stuff" fits very well.

Need a hand? Phil has 8 of them he'd be willing to sell to you for $99.

Right down the street from a bustling block of businesses and restaurants such as the Meanwhile and Electric Cheetah, Phil's Stuff is a fun place to visit while in the neighborhood. The store is overflowing with merchandise; some is antique and some is just interesting. Phil specializes in period pieces for historic home renovations. One can find old heating vents, skeleton keys, and doorknobs that are original as well as vintage. Other antiques grace the shelves, too, whether it's the strange ceramic arms that were previously used to display gloves in stores or if it's some vintage magazines.

The store even carries some new items, too. There are some great yard sculptures, including flying pigs made from recycled scrap metal like license plates and bolts, as well arches, metal spikes with decorative elements on the top for garden ornamentation, and many other goodies. Cast metal coat hooks, bottle openers and other tchotchkes in the shape of animals, angels and mermaids round out the unique new merchandise.

Metal "Flying" Pig

Phil is as interesting as the "stuff" he sells. He's often decked out in a festive Hawaiian shirt and brings his little dog to the store too. He is a bit gruff but it gives him character, which certainly explains the eclectic store. He's always busy in the store, whether it's greeting a regular customer, or buying some curiosities to resell from people who bring them by the store. Keep in mind that Phil's travels in search of antiques sometimes make for irregular hours; on some Saturdays, the store might not be open so it's advised to call ahead of time.

Some of the cast metal pieces available.

For a fun afternoon, stop by Phil's Stuff on a Saturday. After that, it's just a few blocks to bars, restaurants, and other stores on Wealthy.

There's no business like (metal) monkey business at Phil's.

I'll be leaving...on a jet plane

I am excited to announce, after 12 years of wanting to do so, that I am moving to live and work in Europe. It's great to finally realize a goal that has been that long in the making. After all, I feel that I am a person of my word and I am glad to have accomplished what I set out to do.

I'll be living and working in western Germany.

Chug it!

From February 3, 2010

I was talking with my friend last night and we somehow meandered to the topic of wine at Catholic masses. I'm not Catholic, but I attended fourteen years of Catholic school (including pre-school; no worries, I never repeated a grade) so I've had time to ponder these things. We were both really grossed out that at mass, folks all drink out of the same chalice. The representatives doling out the wine usually wipe the rim of the chalice off after each person drinks, but let's be honest here: it may remove lipstick etc. but it's not doing anything to kill germs.

I've heard of some churches giving little "shots" of wine in some sort of Dixie cup or whatever. That seems a lot more hygienic to me. My friend said they're a no-go for him, though; he once visited a Lutheran church and when he went to grab a shot glass, he dropped it on the tray and made a huge clanging noise since it was made of glass.

He also told me of the problems that befall the person doling out the wine. Sometimes there is wine left and apparently it's rude to dump a deity's "blood" down the sink, so the wine doler-outer is obliged to drink up the remaining "blood" after the faithful have had their fill. He said it's a real problem at 8 a.m. mass because that's just way too early to really swig down the wine, whether it's holy wine or not. He had to go to the church's coffee social after the mass and was feeling a little bit too good.

Sometimes even what's familiar is strange

At the beginning of this century, I lived in London for a brief stint. Everything was so new and different to me because before that, I hadn't traveled much past my home state. I've always been interested in the hows and whys of things, and I was lucky enough to have some patient British friends who would explain things to me (like, what is a "garriage?")

I have no idea how this came about, but my friend told me that Carhartt had a store in Convent Garden's trendy shopping area. I made him repeat himself; did he really mean Carhartt? Yes, he did, and he loved their coats. I couldn't help gaping. He was a pretty hip dresser. I asked him again if he actually meant Carhartt Carhartt. I told him that the only people I knew who wore Carhartt were gun-totin' drivers of mudboggin' trucks (patois intended). Well, actually, the people I knew wore muck boots* and wanted to tip cows, but their relatives had guns and trucks. He assured me that yes, Carhartt was indeed hip there and he'd even take me to the store.

I still didn't believe him until we arrived to the brightly lit, minimalist, modern store in a district of high rent storefronts. Techno music was blasting and the clothes there didn't resemble anything Carhartt I had seen at home.

Take this woman's shirt, for example; I couldn't see anyone rocking it out on the streets of London. Women's fashions that are featured on the company's London website couldn't be more different. While some of the London Carhartt fashions are true to Carhartt's country roots, they are so in more of an ironic manner. Fifteen years ago the company couldn't get away with it, but now, perhaps it can, and does.

We left the store, and I told my friend that I finally believed him, but it still blew my mind.

*I had an odd teenagerhood in the city, seriously. I had a really varied, eclectic group of friends; half sipped merlot, spoke several languages, and created vegetarian haute cuisine from scratch; while some of the other friends swilled beer, listened to heavy metal and jumped off bridges; and then there were the Good Country People, who are referenced here.

Best costume ever

At one of the best Halloween parties I've ever attended, my brother's friend showed up in a clear plastic rain slicker. He had random pieces of tin foil taped to the slicker. For the life of me, I couldn't figure out what exactly he was supposed to be; there didn't appear to be any rhyme or reason to how he had taped the tin foil. He told me that he was the Tin Man. It was awesome; I totally didn't get that. I thought that maybe he was dressed up as a homeless dude trying to insulate himself.

At the same party, my brother dressed up as the son of a preacher man (oh, how true!) but he was a preacher, too. He was a bit too into the costume because he kept blessing everyone.

Stop in the name of...oh, wait, that's not safe

Ah, Detroit. My friend's friend P was stopped at a light late one night in an "interesting" neighborhood when a police cruiser pulled him over. What was his transgression?

Apparently P created suspicion because he was actually stopped at the light. The police officer thought he was either drunk, or, upon examining P, dumb, for stopping at the light. Apparently in that particular neighborhood it's not especially safe to stop at the light, or at least that's what P was told.* The officer let him go on his merry way after that.

* For the record, I'm not suggesting blowing through stoplights in Detroit, or anywhere, for that matter.